Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Six Year Wait for a Car?

If I told you had to wait six years for a car to be delivered from the factory would you believe me. Six YEARS?

I shot this new Ferrari for part of an upcoming feature for Rapid Growth. The passionate owner told me he waited 6 years for it to arrive. He was a super nice guy, but none of what I write about below has anything to do with reality. I couldn't help imagine what it's like to wait 6 years for a car.

Here's how the story unfolds by year:

Summer 2002: Place your order at an exclusive car dealership...put down enormous deposit. Salesman gives you a big hug...perhaps holding the embrace just a bit too long...then pass awkward silence by giving each other high fives.

Late 2002: Set up camp in the showroom waiting area...manage to get familiar with many of the complicated plot lines of various daytime soaps...become slightly miffed when Oprah gives 200 audience members new Pontiac's.

Early 2003: Car salesman refuses to bring you more popcorn and rips the People Magazine from your hands after you can't agree on how many times Susan Lucci has lost the Emmy. In anger you shout that Erika Kane is a horrible dresser.

Summer 2003: You leave dealership realizing the coffee is terrible anyway...make mental note of your favorite foods from vending machine...swearing never to use CoffeeMate again as long as you have strength to draw breath.

2004: Occasionally remind yourself of your purchase by making scheduled payments and looking through the brochure the dealer gave you in 2002. It's a bit tattered and sun-faded but you still manage to get a bit misty looking at your car.

2005: Begin yoga classes and breathing exercises to help pass the time. Occasionally glance longingly out the kitchen window at all the cars paired with their happy owners. On sunny mornings the sight of convertibles becomes too much to wipe a tear away but somehow manage to choke back an embarrassing snort.

2006: Take up smoking and surprise even yourself by achieving a high average of 5 packs a day. You enter smoke ring blowing tournaments and travel to Turkey to test yourself against the top competition. Then quit cold turkey 6 months later.

2007: Dealer calls and says only 18 more months to go. 

August 2008: Take delivery of 2008 Ferrari customized for you...bring home to Grand Rapids.

September 2008: Barely drive car for fear of reducing it's value...but the car is such an amazing work of art you feel entirely at peace with your six year journey.

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